About 2 weeks ago, Abygail, my daughter caught a horrible stomach virus. Everything was fine and then at midnight, she became very sick and unable to keep anything, including teaspoons of water down. After nearly 6 hours of vomiting every 15-20 minutes, I made the decision it was time to head to the ER from some much needed fluids. Now, up until this point, we had visited the hospitals 3 times. Once to process our iquamas (residency paperwork), once upon arrival for a high fever and ear infection and once again for a cough that would not let go. All 3 visits had gone well and we have been more than happy with the care.
Upon arrival at the ER, they immediately took her into triage and into a care room. She was quite dehydrated and still very ill. The doctor did a very thorough exam and ordered her to observation (a separate part of the ER) with 2 rounds of fluids and medication to try and stop the vomiting. The nurse who attended her was wonderful. She had no problems with the IV and Abby didn't even flinch when she did it (which I should mention is saying a lot, because for my daughter even the sight of a band aid starts the tears). However, this is also the point where things get a little complicated.
Sometimes, when my mind is busy with other things, I forget I'm in Saudi Arabia and this was one of those times. When Abby was sent to observation, she was sent to the women's observation room. Which of course means my husband was not allowed into the facility, but rather sat outside the area. So while the nurse was getting Abby settled and Abby was being observed and receiving fluids, Chuck was not allowed in the room. What makes it complicated was that the Dr attending Abby was a man, so he would not speak to me, but would only talk to Chuck. The Dr would come in, check her and then walk out to explain his intentions to my husband. With a sick child on IV, I wasn't able to leave her and go and find out what they were planning. A little complicated.
They did make the decision to admit her for 24 hours to ensure the vomiting was controlled and administer fluids until her stomach settled. Chuck told me he would have to return to work and well, my reaction was less than happy. Leave me, with a sick child, in a hospital in Saudi Arabia where the Dr would not speak to me? Um. . . . as a Western women, no thank you. However, here's where things are very different than at home. Once Abby was in the room, Chuck was not allowed to stay. Mothers are required to be with a child at all times, 24/7, however, husbands and fathers are only allowed during visiting hours, which is 4-8pm in the evening. So, although I was desperate for my husband’s support, he was not allowed in the room until 4pm that afternoon. Also, we were in a room with a Saudi lady, who had 2 children with the same stomach virus as Abby. So here are 3 sick children ages 2, 3, and 4, with 2 mothers who do not speak the same language. Oh and due to being in Saudi Arabia, I had to wear my abaya the whole time. I was a little distraught, however, Abby was finally able to rest and they had been able to slow the vomiting, so as exhausted as I might be my child was doing fine.
That evening Chuck visited and one of our dear friends who was a Dr at the hospital also stopped by. Another close friend brought Abby some coloring books and pencils as well, so she was a happier little girl. I had somewhat adjusted to the surroundings and was calm, so things were looking up from all sides. They did move us to a private room, making things a bit more normal. However, if you are in a Saudi Hospital, please note that the hot water is only optional for showers and they do not have towels or soap available. So that evening Abby and I had sponge baths with paper towels and hand sanitizer.
We made it through the night; Abby was able to keep jello and crackers down and by morning was much better. However, the Dr who came to see her that morning, was a man, and again would not talk to me. It was not during visiting hours, so Chuck was not there to speak on our behalf. The Dr who saw her did not want to discharge her for another 24 hours because the nurse had not put in her chart that she had eaten and drank (again, I was not able to tell the Dr as I was a woman and he just ignored my plea to release her, and my explanation that she had eaten). This is where things went from frustrating to downright miserable.
Abby was off the IV and doing very well, playing, coloring, and pretty much back to normal (asking for a cheeseburger for lunch) etc. Me? I caught the bug and became very sick. So while she is bouncing around, mad that she's stuck in one room, I was doing my best to entertain her, while I ran to the bathroom. I made it to 4pm (visiting hours) and pleaded with my husband to speak to the Dr. He was able to talk to the Dr and they agreed that if Abby's white blood cell count returned to normal, she could be discharged. Within the hour, we were finally home!
Abby received excellent care. The nurses were fantastic and the Dr's were very thorough, however, the customs were something I was not ready for. Common sense should have told me that women and men were separate, but for a woman from the US, I was not prepared. I do not want to have to visit the ER or hospital again here or anywhere, but if I had been more prepared on what to expect, I may have been calmer.
So here's my note for those who may be in this situation 1) your husband will not be allowed with you. Just know, you are on your own; 2) if the Dr is a man, he may or may not respond to your questions, be sure to have your husband do the talking and get as much information as you can; 3) bring towels, toothbrush and soap from home, they don't have it in the hospital nor in the gift shop; 4) stay calm, for your sanity and your child's; and 5) laugh laugh laugh about the craziness afterward with friends. Sometimes, laughter is the best medicine and best survival tactic I've found on this crazy adventure!